Ideas To Ponder Archives

"Ideas to Ponder" are summary ideas at the end of each chapter of Intimacy & Desire. The Ideas to Ponder Blog unpacks these key thoughts, principles, or observations, and highlights additional points within Intimacy & Desire.

Normal people have sexual desire problems. Virtually all couples have sexual desire problems sooner or later. 25% of almost 20,000 people usually have desire problems, and 36% almost always have them.

People who can’t control themselves control the people around them. When you rely on someone for a positive reflected sense of self, you invariably try to control him.

Interdependence as a concept has been around for years, but it is badly misunderstood. This is why people talking the most about it are usually unable to do it. The problem isn't that they have difficulty putting their ideals into practice (but which is often true). The problem is their idea of interdependence is systematically wrong.